thesinger
thelyrics
thechords
themelody
foryou
you're
my song.
it's been so long.
i never had a chance to play this for you.
cos everytime the music starts,
i always cannot go with the tune.
and then you went away,
now the lyrics seem to stray.
so how can i not love you?
when i live just for you.
you took away the heart in me,
that once beat in harmony.
now, i am torn apart,
feeling unemotional somehow.
sometimes, i can't help but cry.
i miss the way we used to be.
and the sad part,
the song i made,
is just a music that will fade
welcome to candice's blog. you have now entered her world of emotions, let-gos and setbacks. please try to tag on the taggie and add happiness into her life and make sure she is not alone on this devastating path of her life. thank you.
hey there ppl, i know my blog's EMPTY. kinda. willl update it often and add more nice stuff soons kays? thanks. (:
and the reasonis you.
.candice.au.eong.tian.ying
.female.
.12goinon13.
.3/11/1992.
.ex-peihwa.current.rgs.bowling.waddlian.104er.
.likes happy endings.
.hates sad endings.
.alicia keys. christina aguilera.
.stressed.
.up.
.totally.
but everythingmeans nothing.
Friday, June 17, 2005
Monday – training. I went to meet kiwi at her bus stop at bout 11.25. I was complaining to her about how long darned 985 takes to come. Then 970 came and we boarded the bus. It didn’t turn into 6th avenue. It didn’t turn into king albert’s park. It turned into the highway. Shock. Fear. Worry. Engulfed us that our faces turned pale and we just wanted to smash through the windows and escape. Bwahs. Wad a dumb description. Damn exaggerating la. Ok. So we WERE scared mah. But we were like: oi can’t be we took the wrong bus mah. So I said maybe the driver went wrong way. So we comforted ourselves until we came out of the highway and reached toapayoh. Toa payoh is in the east. Signature park – our starting point in the west. Walao. Ok we WERE scared., then we reach serangoon. I was like I call my fren she live here k? by the time I wanted to call her we had entered angmokio. Bwahs. Scared man. We looked at every bus stop – the bus numbers. All foreign like 26, 23, 410. never see b4, aiyohs. Then I looked behind. The bold words 985 freaked me out. Was it out to take revenge on mmmmmmmee?! For complaining to kiwi about it? Ahh. Then I looked around the bus. A man with a pram without a baby . an old man sitting unusually quietly behind. The two gangsters I heard talking when on the highway mysteriously disappeared. A lady putting on makeup for the whole journey, wearing a kind of cap that don’t allow me to see her face. Ahh then we ENTERED geylang. Oh my goshness. The sight was just so ‘experiencing’ . yeahh. Bwahs. You wont’ know what I mean unless u were me. Sights of unsightly sights. Bahs. Ok then I felt my psychic powers coming again. I said ok I can’t take this no more. Lets alight at the next stop and cross the road and take a bus back and tell others that we’ll be late for training. I looked. The bus bottom there was an red strip. When I entered ‘970’ i saw tat it was orange. You know there’s a diff between orange and red. Ok so we did. We crossed the road. Then kiwi exclaimed is that an mrt station. Sure it was. We were exhilarated totally cann. Through the whole journey after the highway we’ve been trying how to reach an mrt station so we could go to tiong bahru and take a bus to kimseng. Ok so we took mrt, took 195 to kimseng. We were not even late mann and so we told everyone about our exciting. Oh ya and while taking 195 we realized that we had to alight at the stop outside greatworldcity. Ahh. Then we ran through the whole great world city like feng pos and reached kimseng. In time. Yayes. Ok. I’m seriously not lying bout anything here. 100% real story by candice cann? Ahh then I bowled terribly lahs. 985 I wanna bang you into a tree now! Ahh. The thought of these 3 numbers make my nerves flare totally! Ahh shit then aunty cat was saying my back was so straight when I stepped the second last step. Well I just couldn’t ‘bend’ down. Ahh. How. Shit. Darn 985. ok so the training was over damn damn damn damn fast. The fastest ever training. I guess I was thinking too much about the exciting journey earlier on mahs. Ok so me and nic went to yoshinoya to eat. While kiwi n tessa went home. Then the nice counter lady gave us yoshinoya coupons! Yays. Got salmon bowl but no beef bowl offer! Hahaha. Crazy me I saved a dollar~ whoohoo! Ok then. So we waited a darn long time for freaky time for 970. it was a jerky ride. My back kept slamming against the acrylic window. Mann. Ok. Then I alighted. Wait for 985. damn damn damn. Another painful and angered 25min. where got bus take so long wan siah? Mann. Then I stomped up the bus and stood at the same place again. However. My back didn’t even slam against the acrylic once. Not even once. FREAKY> ahh. Man oh man. And darn 985. EVEN if we had took the wrong bus. EVEN if we had. It should not have gone onto the highway. It should have gone to king alberts can? Waseh. Dam driver.kept scratching his head. Ahh. Hope he scratches it until his skin comes out and his brain pops out and he dies in that pathetic 985. hooray good ending for you and me. Haha. Fraudness in my laughter mann. Pissed. I have to take 985 tomorrow two times. Ahh shit. Well I have to live with 985 for the rest of my life mahn. Ahh. Wahpiang. Shit lah. I can’t stand it. I just want a Mercedes to fetch me to school and fetch me home!!! Or shall I have wings? Or shall I be a ghost and I can appear anywhere, anytime? Boo. Ahh. Pissed. Can’t stand seeing that darn 985 bobbing up and down towards the bus stop down the road as if it was obese. Let ppl wait so long still take ur time ahs. Walao. Hmm. Shall give it one last chance tomorrow. Hope me and kiwi don’t take wrong bus. Well I think the bus was wrong anyway. Two ppl’s eyes COULDN’T fail. K. well actually getting lost is RATHER fun. But have to bring the bus directory book along… or at least not getting lost in GEYLANG, where it’s in a totally different direction from the area youre familiar with. And also I think 985 will play with me tomorrow. I said so many bad things. Ah. One last chance kay, 985? I know I sound stupid talking to a bus, but I believe that it’s alive, or else it wouldn’t hav the ability to play such a dirty trick on me. Getting me lost in geylang. What a joke. BWHAS. One last chance hor!! Hmph! Ha. I’m happier now (:
Up and down I go; roundabout I ran; lost
Love will find a way+++
Sometimes I wonder if the world is just going against me. Just ME. Me and me alone. What have I done to suffer such injustice and many minor setbacks and worries? So many darts are racing their way towards my picture hanging on the wall now. I just can’t fight all of them back and end up being more hurt. I’m standing in the middle of an empty road. And then, hundreds of speeding racing cars start zooming towards me. Just me and me alone. Alone. That word. Is absolutely true. I’m just so alone in this lonely world of mine. Solving problems alone. Being alone. In my lonely world. Just alone. Every single thing I face is not some unfortunate thing or claimed as ‘suay’, but it’s actually the world going against me. For example whenever I go and buy slippers. The innocent voice will ring out: oh sorry miss no more of your size. Then I will kick my dream slippers outta my feet and walk off. Well you may think. The WORLD going against me. Isn’t the world dying now? I mean, environmentally. I’m not implying that all my ‘badluck’ is caused by deforestation, air trapped in the atmosphere or something. Oh my god how dumb can I get. The EARTH is dying not the WORLD. See? The world is going against me by making getting stupider. That’s wad I mean. The world, is all the countries, all the people. And you can say the oceans and the trees and the sky and the clouds and the sun. aha you may say they’re natural stuff they just do what they HAVE to do so it’s not their fault, not my fault. But isn’t it too much of a coincidence when it rains when you are out and you don’t have an umbrella. Or can it be that you are so ‘suay’? there’s no such thing as suay, its just a term that ppl, I mean Singaporeans like to use when they meet with a bad or embarrassing incident. Well. Of course some may think. I say the world is going against me. But sometimes, like for example I got into bowling. AT THAT MOMENT, do I think that the world is going against me? No of course, it depends on the type of news and situation I receive and I am in. hmmm .for example, I had a paper cut. Oh well I was cut by a flitter flutter light layer of dead wood which people treat as rubbish and is not alive? How stupid/clumsy can I get. At that moment I would think . the world is simply going against me. Cos, the thing is. You hardly get a paper cut. It’s the hols now. I actually feel more ‘the world is against me’. WHY? Cos when school starts and I’m busy, I don’t have much time to think about all these discouraging things. I have to eat, sleep, do homework, pts. And find some time for relaxation. Not thinking the world is against ME,but during school I think of that phrase a lot. Like during lessons, when the teacher’s talking I would think: the world’s against me. ME and me alone. Sometimes because I don’t understand what the heck the teacher’s talking about. Sometimes I get frustrated when everyone just raise up their hands like beansprouts to answer qns. Honestly I don’t know how to answer them. Even if I had the slightest hint, I wouldn’t raise up my hand. It’s just… there’s no need to as others will answer too and give an even better answer. You may think that I’m the cause. Of the world going against me. Being so cowardly not to answer qns. So stupid. The world is dying. Blah blah. But you won’t understand how I feel unless. You’re me. Well that’s obvious isn’t it. You may be feeling happy now but I can’t feel it and I can’t feel how you feel. So yahs. Ahh some of my frustrations gone.
===the world. Going against me. Me and me alone===
lemme talk bout wed’s training. Me and kiwi met at 8.20am. training starts at 1015.you all must be thinking. Crazy . meet so early. But uncle jim said MAYBE he would come at 9.30 to teach us some sparing tips yah so we met lah. We reached that at 9.15. din feel like going yet. Anyway the alley was NOT even open. So we went to great world. Hardly any shops open. Hardly anione around. We played on the escalators. Going up and down . nobody cared (: haha. Then we went to golden village. Then came across this pet shop displaying mice and rabbits. The shop was not open. And the rabbit which I named spotty kept saying hello to us. So sweet. It always scratched the cage and jumped around, standing on its two feet. Kiwi was fascinated with the scurrying little mice, jumping and crawling over each other. I was still so attracted to spotty. Soon we left and were the first to reach the alley among the whole team. Abby soon came and let us see the pics she took in Australia. Hais. How I wish I could go. Well.. can’t be too demanding. At 10 most ppl came and we started training. Firstly we had to spare pin 5. seemed so easy but it’s quite difficult actually. Then we tried pin 10 n 7. I cannot cannot cannot spare pin 10!! Arh! Then we played games. I got… 124, same as chrissy. Training passed by like a breeze. Me nic and tessa were ‘forced’ by dearest Audrey to play an extra game. Well not forced. INVITED!! Yeahh. So we played lors. I got… 118. ya. So me and nic, for the 7th time, the both of us went to have lunch together and take 970 together back home. We wanted to eat yoshinoya at first but nic had not enough money so we had to go to kfc, as usual I ordered the or fillet burger meal. And nic the zinger zinger meal. Bwahs. Then she was screaming at the horrible stench of my coleslaw. The stupid malay counter person never give me spoon. But I was lazy to take so I just folded the coleslaw cap cover and ate it. When I wanted to pour the unnecessary sauce away, some of the coleslaw dropped out and nic went EWWWWW, so loudly. Then I saw kiwi and her pri sch frens. Including vanes wu. Said hi to her and went back to my disgusting lunch. So we just took darned 970. the rest of the day went fine. Unsuccessful, unfruitful, as normal.
+just wasting every heartbeat in me+
sorry for the delay of the post, but NOW my internet’s STARTING to work, not very stable yet. Hmms. Training just ended. It was terrible fast and short and disappointing, as usual. My sixth sense powers came back and me and nic ended up with a terribly terrible outcome. Bwahs. Right, nic?
if i ain't got you|3:18 PM
i've waitedall my life.