thesinger
thelyrics
thechords
themelody
foryou
you're
my song.
it's been so long.
i never had a chance to play this for you.
cos everytime the music starts,
i always cannot go with the tune.
and then you went away,
now the lyrics seem to stray.
so how can i not love you?
when i live just for you.
you took away the heart in me,
that once beat in harmony.
now, i am torn apart,
feeling unemotional somehow.
sometimes, i can't help but cry.
i miss the way we used to be.
and the sad part,
the song i made,
is just a music that will fade
welcome to candice's blog. you have now entered her world of emotions, let-gos and setbacks. please try to tag on the taggie and add happiness into her life and make sure she is not alone on this devastating path of her life. thank you.
hey there ppl, i know my blog's EMPTY. kinda. willl update it often and add more nice stuff soons kays? thanks. (:
and the reasonis you.
.candice.au.eong.tian.ying
.female.
.12goinon13.
.3/11/1992.
.ex-peihwa.current.rgs.bowling.waddlian.104er.
.likes happy endings.
.hates sad endings.
.alicia keys. christina aguilera.
.stressed.
.up.
.totally.
but everythingmeans nothing.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
its national day. whoo. my first reaction was : SO?
i shouldn't be glad. why? anyway i have reasons.
piano exam on wed. GREAT. i have to face the black and white monochrome keyboard today the whole day! and scales just keep repeating in my head.
chemistry test on friday. GREAT. you know my chemistry isn't very up to standard. even bong my lab partner rolls her eyes at me when i ask stupid questions that if you can't answer that, aha a zero for the test. and. our experiments always go BANG. as in not explosions, but like never successful. i guess i'm a jinx.
yesterday was a highly exciting yet traumatising day. but i do not wish to talk about it. it makes me feel sad. and i do not wish to put what happened in my daily life here. but i want to put how i feel here. but because of those things that happened, then i got things to say about what i feel. sometimes, we never think that something would happen. but it happens. sometimes, we feel that something good/bad is going to happen. and it does. sometimes, you think you're going to fail. you didn't . you got the highest score in the cohort. sometimes, you think you're going to score miraculously well. you didn't. you failed. things are always like that. some say: confidence is the key to success. yes, confidence. but confidence has different faces. in many areas, like studies, games, even watching tv. but some say. cannot be overconfident!then you will suffer the consequences in the end! i don't understand. people want confidence. but cannot be over confident. its not easy to control our feelings. so i think as long as you're confident, great. but the more confident the better right? well i don't think the word over-confident should even be in the dictionary. because there is no such thing as different levels of confidence, you have it, you have it. well this is WHAT i feel.
i don't think ignoring someone for fun is thrilling unless you have some big problem in your head. it really makes my veins burst when someone ignores you for a whole week and suddenly says aiya i playing with you only. if you had helped your fren in a lot a lot of ways, and she does this to you, what will you feel? i'd feel like tearing her into pieces, insulting her, calling her a disgraceful and ingrateful ingrate. and then, i would think that how come i was so guillible to have actually helped her, getting her spiteful ignorance which was just an act of mischief?? idiot. i hate this feeling of being CHEATED. i know, i have a nice heart. but i know when to stop being taken advantage of, as in, not physically, but emotionally. i did so much for her, and yet she does it to me. i decided, ive been through so much of this in my whole life, i'm not going to give way any longer. unless she needs me and gives in to me, i'm not going to help her again.after all that i've done for her. never a word of thanks or gratitude. well i can accept that. cos sometimes its really quite hard to say it in front of people. but she should have done somethings for me to show her thanks, not ignoring me. if she had not acknowledged me after that week, i would have just given her a tight slap. i can't stand it anymore. after all this, i could never feel the sincerity in her heart ever again.
suddenly, i feel that one's birthday is not something big to celebrate. it's just a mark of the year that you've grown a year older. growing older isn't good. last time i wanted to be an adult. now, i wish i can stop time and go back to my childhood days. every year you grow older, the burden gets bigger. the burder gets bigger, more frustrations, poorer health, weaker heart. i don't see the need the celebrate, but sometimes, celebrating a birthday is just a form of a friendly gathering. birthday doesn't mean getting presents. suddenly i think. why must we receive presents on our birthday? it doesn't make any sense at all. really. the more i think about it, the more ridiculous it is. a sign of friendship, love, or care? anyway, i'm going to continue buying presents for birthdays, to show my gratitude for someone being there for me, not like someone who just doesnt cares, as long as she gets some benefits from you, not your friendship.
nothing lasts.
if i ain't got you|12:30 PM
i've waitedall my life.